Career Advice Career Guidance and Counselling

The Best Ways to Deal with Difficult People at Work

Different personalities and perspectives in the workplace help keep businesses moving forward, but differing opinions can lead to friction in the office as well. A diverse group of people working together allows their skills, expertise, knowledge, experiences, and creativity to synergise in ways no single person could ever be capable of. While this can do wonders for a company’s productivity and innovation, the harsh reality is that not everyone will always get along and it’s inevitable that people, personalities, and ideas will clash given enough time together. As diversity continues to be an integral part of business, how can we learn to better deal with the more difficult people at work? 

Don’t take things personally. Most disagreements in the workplace are of a professional nature, and for the most part, your coworkers are fighting against certain policies or processes and not you personally. It would be rare that any of your coworkers would butt heads with you because they don’t like the way you dress or because of how you choose to spend your weekends. Allowing yourself to get worked up because a colleague has a different idea of how something should get done is a waste of your time and energy. Instead, take a step back and consider if you’re overreacting. Let these differences slide off your back and focus on the work that needs to get done. 

Talk it out. If it seems that you simply cannot put your differences aside with someone at work, it may be best to address the issue directly with the person in question. As awkward and anxiety-inducing as it may be, having a direct and honest conversation in private may help to clear the air. Go into the discussion with an open mind. They may not even be aware of the effect their words or actions have had on you. During your conversation, remember to use “I”statements to avoid sounding accusatory and aggressive. At the conclusion, try to reach an agreement as to how you both can move forward in more positive and supportive ways towards one another. 

Get outside help. If talking directly to your colleague doesn’t help, it may be time to escalate the problem to someone else, such as a manager or a human resources representative, who may be able to act as a mediator. When you approach the mediator, avoid statements that make you sound like someone who’s merely complaining and address the problem in terms ofhow it affects you and your productivity. Work with the mediator to find ways in which the problem can be approached and resolved with the disagreeable coworker. Recognise that there will be actionable items on your part as well.

Find an escape. If all else fails and the difficult coworker is still unpleasant to work with, despite the intervention with your superiors and/or human resources, you have two options left. You either find a new role within your company that will not require you to work with this uncooperative individual or you quit your job. While the latter may seem too drastic a measure, consider how the current company atmosphere continues to allow a troublesome employee remain employed and unpleasant to his or her peers. Is that the kind of place you want to work? 

At some point, your own happiness and productivity must come first and if your efforts to rectify and improve the relationship with a difficult employee doesn’t lead to any improvement, then your skills and talents should be taken where it can be appreciated and allowed to thrive.